Dilemmas...

Finally.. on MC, a chance to rest.

So why is it that I am sitting in the living room still thinking if i should go back to work tomorrow?

Is it as what some one mentioned? We care too much about what people think and end up worried of being judged. It is so easy to say, "Don't bother about it." but yet it is so difficult to do so.

That's probably why i would never try to get MC for the fear that people would say I am faking it. But this week has been such a trying week. It seems like it took forever to reach friday. Coughing my lungs out at night and in the morning to clear the phlegm is taking up a bit of energy, especially when i can't sleep at night.

I would love to go back to the days when i was no one, the days when i took instructions, the days when i could look to someone for advice or answers. The days that i was carefree and didn't have responsibilities weighing me down. So childish i know..

Now, everyone in the centre turns to me when they have problems. What about me? Who do i turn to? Who can i turn to?

I committed a PR boo boo today.. Feeling guilty.

Do we matter to the organisation? Why is it that someone can actually say we must treat the unwilling ones properly as they are important people, "father, mother's sons"? What about us? Aren't we someone else's children too?